Was surprised and slightly spooked to see a friendly email in my inbox from some Indian dude inviting us to a party at his house because though I think he was at a party we had been to, I have no recollection of actually meeting him. But it was a nice gesture and we decided we shouldn’t be so unfriendly, so we went.

It turned out to be one of those experiences you have been keeping your distance in order to avoid. I’m not saying it was all bad. The host was a chilled out enough guy, there may have been a couple of people around but really none of them were my type. Except the people I already knew.

It was one of those parties where all the guys stand in the balcony and all the women sit around. And if you have nothing in common with any of the women, it gets old. These were just not my kind of people. They were mainstream Indian young people – neither glamourous nor cool. I don’t mean to sound as snobby as I do but I have no better way to articulate the uhh-I-want-to-leave-feeling. Maybe the easiest way to explain is that these people would never get my sense of humour, they would not be able to see the difference between quirky and weird.

But you cannot be rude so you stay. And force questions out of your mouth and try to tone yourself down so that the gap between you and them doesn’t seem to huge. And you drink because then at least you are doing something, at least you are taking part. Finally you leave. Without exchanging numbers despite the let’s catch ups and with the uncomfortable knowledge on both sides that you probably won’t and why are we saying this then.