1) Polish up your resume. Then belatedly switch windows when the guy behind you stands up and stares at your screen only to realise the open window now has a job search website.

2) Trawl through job search websites.

3) Apply to an average of three jobs everyday. Watch your correspondence disappear into the black hole that is the cyberworld of job applications never to be heard of again.

4) Check your email every day and find that you have recieved no responses. Swallow the mounting panic. Apply to even the companies you decided were too unheard of for you.

5) Start to a shuffling sound behind you and realise the other guy who sits behind you was probably standing very still behind before he decided to shuffle and make you aware of his presence to ask you something related to actual work which he then thinks better of.

6) Have dreams involving new job of the kind you would hate but which suddenly seems very attractive.

7) Whine to everyone you know about how you hate your job.

8) Decide to have a chat with your boss about upcoming projects. Come out feedling much better. Then have another meeting in which you’re convinced your boss is a complete moron.

9) Give in to desire to check email AGAIN and realise that the most unlikely prospective employer has mailed back. The mail goes:

Dear Ms C,

Would appreciate it if you could submit your application with you CV attached.

Gahhhhhh!

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