It appears that I have run out of future employment options. The one I really wanted did not pan out – I had anyway almost given up on it but as eM says on her blog, it’s sometimes the little hopes that kill you. I had the teeniest little hope that it would work out, and when it didn’t I felt flat, somewhat numb, unable to focus on my current job.
But I got a healthy dose of perspective soon after. V came home and told me that his boss’s boss was fired. Just like that. Out of the blue. What makes it sadder was that I have briefly met this guy and he seemed like a nice person – something of a philosopher-teacher who did not complete fit with the corporate sharks he was undoubtedly surrounded by and this was probably his downfall. At that level, it’s hard to find a job and harder when you’ve been fired. This guy lives alone – his wife and kids are in another country and it’s hard to imagine what he must be feeling with nobody to go home to and to tell him that it’s all going to be ok.
At times like this, you realise that you’re lucky to even have a job.
And anyway, now I’m so busy that I can’t really think about applying to anything else. I still do the odd application mechanically but I’m not thinking about it. I’m even beginning to think that it’s not such a bad thing if I stay here for another six months – I need a raise and a slight revamp of duties but it’s not really as bad as I always make it out to be.