On Wednesday, I took the mommy to Macau. The moment I stepped into the Central square, I was rejuvenated. I love the brightly painted old buildings and cobbled streets that make you feel like you’re in Portugal or Goa. I love stepping into doorways and discovering courtyard gardens and old churches.

And paradoxically, I love the new and glitzy side of Macau too. From the first time I stepped into a casino, I was hooked. It may be ostentatious or kitchy or all of them in one like The Venetian but it’s the one location in which I can tolerate that level of glitter. And I love the thrill of placing a bet, that moment of suspense and the excitement of winning. Most people I’ve taken either to the casino or the races have a similar reaction and I can see how it can become addictive and because I can see that, it doesn’t control me.

Unfortunately, there’s only one game I know how to play and no it’s not the slot machine – that’s really lame and you never win and I like winning – it’s called ‘big and small’ and if you’re careful, you can always win. You need to pick the right table and watch the board and then it becomes a little like the stockmarket.

So this time, like any other, I was fiddling with my chips and leaning just a bit over the edge of the table and in that moment between when the dice is cast and when the result is revealed, I had an ephiphany. Which is…

Gambling is like a personality test. It tells you who you are:

1) My mom – who keeps asking before she puts something down but tends to take risks, sometimes betting on numbers even though she doesn’t know what that means. Or deciding to bet on whatever the big winner at the table is bettin even if she has no idea what the logic is. Still ended up making more than me.

2) V’s mom – who risks big and wins big.

3) V – who likes to make grand gestures, betting all his chips on one number and then losing everything. Not to affected about it either.

4) Me – extremely cautious and will only bet if I’m reasonably sure I’m going to win. Even then, will not bet a big amount. My shrink was right. I am a control freak.