1) Buying books on pregnancy. If I could have got a free copy of What to Expect from my sis I would have taken it. But that was not to be and now I’ve figured that there’s enough information on the Internet. Especially since the things I really wanted to know, related to all the scares that came up during my first trimester, might not be contained in a book for general use. On the Net however, there are discussion boards of women swapping tips and sharing stories, and one can cross check what they are saying on more reputable sites. Contrary to popular opinion, that all the babble on the Net would add to my anxiety, I found the stuff shared by these women largely reassuring, especially for the most serious illness. Or maybe I saw reassurance because I was looking for it.

2) Planning a baby room. Partly because there is no room for a baby room. Also because from what I’ve seen the baby room is seldom used in the first few months. Ditto for buying masses of stuff for the baby, which again I’ve seen is seldom used. I’m planning to get basic stuff (what exactly, I’m yet to determine… I’m thinking cot, strolley… erm what else?) if possible secondhand. I’m not even that enthu about shopping for baby clothes – I think I exhausted that urge buying my sis and cousins stuff because they outgrow it so fast. All secondhand clothes are welcome.

One of V’s friends who had a baby last year said he could not convince his wife to get anything secondhand and challenged V to ask me if I would be ok with secondhand baby stuff. I was like yeah, as long as I can be reasonably sure it’s safe. So particularly if I know the person who is giving it to me, I’m fine with it. V then asked me if I’d buy a secondhand handbag and I said no! Hahaha! But basically my logic is, the pleasure of handbags is their newness. Whereas a baby wouldn’t know or care about its stuff so why waste money on it. And babies have this weird habit of rejecting the shiny new thing in favour of some tatty old thing anyway.

3) Being paranoid about diet. I did start out trying to be as healthy as possible. But then I started puking. And I realised I needed to keep some food down, and I was better of eating things that stayed down even if they weren’t in the approved list. My doctor’s advice anyway was simple: cut down on tea and coffee (not eliminate!), eat stuff that is well cooked through and wash raw veggies thoroughly, don’t eat too much fish. For the first trimester, I ended up having a carb heavy diet with some protein, fruits and veggies just weren’t doing it for me but I managed to keep down a vitamin so hopefully whatever I didn’t get from my diet I got from that. Now I’m going to try and be more healthy. But the more I read up on what to eat and what not to, the more cross I get. It seems like everything is bad. The other day, I was proud of myself for eating eggplant and then I googled it to see what nutrients I might have got and apparently eggplant is bad. I also intensely dislike the mothers on these forums who go “no no, that is bad for baby” with no proper evidence at all.