I have decided I am just going to stop agonizing and enjoy (or at least survive calmly) this pregnancy. After the nightmare first trimester, which involved puking and spotting blood, nothing could really faze me. I would google and seek reassurance from any positive answers I saw. Contrary to most people’s experience of the Internet and medical stuff, I found more good news than bad, or maybe I focused on what I wanted to hear. But really, I found reassurance on the Internet.

I let myself go a little and ate as much as I wanted. Because the main problem in the second trimester is I am sooo hungry. I allowed myself some sweet treats, though really I don’t think too much by the standards by which most people regularly consume sweets.

My last appointment brought me down to earth and it’s been downhill from there. I got a bit stressed despite myself and vowed the walk more. However, pushing myself – and for some reason that week I was inexplicably tired, maybe because I wasn’t sleeping that well, maybe because I was stressing a bit about my weight – seemed to have resulted in a series of regular Braxton-Hicks contractions which then scared me even more.

In this pregnancy, I seem to oscillate between “oh just ignore it or wait it out” to “should I go in and see a doc, oh no”. Most pregnant women tend to be the latter while I tended to the former. I would stress for a night and then get on with life. Generally, the problem resolved itself. I have actually had no serious issues. Fingers crossed.

So don’t know what happened to me in August with a doctor’s visit almost every week. I should just get over my shyness of calling the doctor instead of going in and save myself some money.

Anyway I have decided:

a) To eat as I please, with some caution because honestly, the hunger and stress about not eating seem to be doing me worse. Besides, if this woman can have a 19 lb baby, I think my 8 lber will be fine even if it means a c-section.

b) To push myself on exercise only if my body can handle it. If I’m tired, drop it.

c) To resist the urge to rush into the doctor

d) To talk less about this pregnancy

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