I’m coming up on the big 30 soon and all around me friends are celebrating their milestone birthdays with aplomb. Me, I kind of forgot about it till I was reminded by a cousin. The big milestone for me this year will be the birth of my son and that’s the one I have my eye on.
Also, I don’t have any of the leave-behind-the-20s regret that is supposed to be customary. It feels appropriate that I will be 30. Apart from the huge fact that I’m going to be a mother, my life has slowed down considerably. My career is stable (I hope!), my marriage has settled into an even keel (I think I have passed the Bridget Jones Edge of Reason phase where one is still a little unsure of one’s partner, something is took me five years of marriage and seven years of knowing V to do) and a night on the town is a very rare and barely missed happening. I am comfortable in my own skin. I care about what people think about me (genuinely) less. I know who my friends are and I don’t want/need too many more. I am less tolerant of people who piss me off and yet, more willing to hold my tongue too. I definitely look older.
I know I have grown/matured/aged but what I didn’t realize was is how different my writing is. Recently, Curly sent me on a quest to my very first blog and I was stunned at how different my voice was five years ago. I sounded so sassy and…young! I was so full of piss-and-vinegar. My rants had an edge that was so chick-lit. I am so much more serious and muted now. The old me flashes through only occasionally in my writing.
So in honour of who I was five years ago, and because I really enjoyed reading those old posts, I’m going to repost some of them here in run-up to my birthday. Hope they make you smile as much as they made me!
Ok so here goes:
Now I’m at the edge of reason. I’m in that safe secure place, where one constantly tiptoes around the other person in a bid to be perfect, smokes furtively in the bathroom and fights off the calories with even more desperation. I wonder if I will get into a snit over a leggy hair-flicking type…Oh no! He’s in Hong Kong. And of course, suddenly the fuckwit appears like the green-eyed monster in the wings.
Curiouser and curiouser.
My thoughts 5 years on:
Wow, clearly the Edge of Reason theme was on my mind then too. Maybe I should write the third part of the Bridget Jones series since Helen Fielding is showing no signs of…