V had a freakout about the amount of time I’m spending reading. I had heard about the ‘missing spouse’ syndrome from a few people but had not paid serious attention. V of course was clueless as to what having a spouse doing a PhD would entail, and I myself didn’t have a clue. I figured if I put in 9 hours of work, I could switch those to PhD and manage, only now I would have a say which hours those were exactly. But the first week was crazy and I struggled not to panic myself.

In the midst of it, getting a lecture from V on neglecting the children pissed me off. After all, I had barely got a handle on things myself. And they were hardly neglected except that the time I did spend with them, he didn’t witness. The main person who was getting neglected was him, and while I regretted that I do recall how absent he was when he started his job in Hong Kong. Only that was nine years ago and he has amnesia. He has since apologised but the whole episode left a bad taste in my mouth.

That was on Sunday. On Monday, I attended the class I’m sitting in.One of my irrational fears is landing up in the wrong classroom while the class is going on elsewhere, and this fear proved to be well-grounded because I was indeed in the wrong classroom and couldn’t get the wifi to work so I could check where the actual class was. Luckily, I had skipped dropping Benji to kindergarten so I was early and could step out and ask a likely looking passerby if they were headed to that class which they were.

The class turned out to be a tad pointless, if I’m honest, but at least it got me to university – and then headed to my office to work on the article I’m writing. People have chosen their desks at random and I’m pleased with mine although it’s a bit small. Another anxiety is that because there is nothing to indicate it’s indeed my desk someone else would grab it, and I determined to bring some stuff to pin up just to mark my territory (as everyone else seems to have done, it’s astonishing how quickly they ‘made it home’ despite being absent in person.)

I then headed to mid-autumn festival lunch with former colleagues, which was a really sweet gathering. New girl who has replaced me seemed a tad distant – maybe she was afraid I’m going to keep popping up which I’m not. Got home and spent some time with the kids before working on my article some more.

The next day was the mid-autumn festival and we went to Ocean Park. It was all fine and dandy until we got home and the kids refused to nap and then proceeded to meltdown from there. Let me just say that at one point I was hugging two screaming naked children. Why they were both naked is a long story I’m not going to tell.

Today was how I would like my life to be. Dropped Benji to school, where he is doing really well I’m happy to report. Unfortunately, I couldn’t find the elusive shortcut lift again and Benji went: “But Tita (our helper) always knows where to go.” Hmph. I have a perfectly good route but it’s through a bus interchange and V doesn’t want the helpers cutting through that so E has been using the lift route he discovered except I haven’t been able to find it. We were just on time, and I tried not to feel guilty about being just-on-timem as opposed to early as E always is, again.

Paid a visit to the library and logged into my email where I was relieved to discover that my e-learning account at the other uni has been sorted so I don’t need to scrimmage to find every reading myself for the first couple of weeks as it was looking like I’d have to do. Instead they’ve all been uploaded onto the system I can now access, hurrah! So I just browsed and found more than a few books I’d like to read for my topic.

I’ve swallowed my vanity and switched from my green leather tote to a sporty green backpack because I don’t think one shoulder can bear the weight of a laptop and a pile of books. Ugly as it is, carrying the weight on both shoulders really makes a wealth of difference. Had a sandwich in a cafe while reading one of the books and loving my life. Headed to my office to finished of my artilce and then went for yoga class after a two-week hiatus. I did not die but I did not excel.

The good thing about this schedule is that I don’t have a carry a change of clothes. I can just head home after yoga and take a shower and nap. Except renovation work in house above prevented sleep, gah. Emerged from bedroom in time for kids waking from thier nap and spent a nice hour or so with them, till they went off downstairs to play…and here I am.