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oceans8

I’ve pretty much stopped watching Hollywood movies mainly because I find them stupid and choc a bloc with unpalatable stereotypes, but about once or (gasp!) twice a year I might find a film or two to get excited about.

Like Black Panther or Last Jedi. Note that these are superhero films or thereabouts; in these it’s easier to suspend disbelief.

The run-up to the latest Ocean film convinced me to give it a shot; a star cast of women featuring Cate Blanchett – I could get on board with that.

I thought it could be a chick flick that I could go to with a gang of girls, except none of the said girls were up for it, most because the weekend I wanted to go didn’t work but one because the reviews were bad.

Which they were though some feminist blogs did have positive things to say, from which I took heart.

In the end, I dragged V which was not the best choice. My thoughts:

1. Sandra Bullock always has an ‘interesting’ nose but it was particularly noticeable here. Is it possible she had some work done to it, or that her face as thinned too much. I unfortunately have to agree with V that in some shots she looked like Michael Jackson.

2. Both Cate Blanchett and Sandra Bullock had too much make-up on. If you can see the foundation, it’s not a good sign. What were the make-up artists and cinematographers thinking?

3. I have a girl crush on Cate Blanchett but I don’t know whether it was because she was acting in such a stupid film – and it was a stupid film – that she came across as a bad actress. She just didn’t inhabit that character.

4. With the huge budget, you’d think the screenwriters would have tried a bit harder with the plot. The first bit when Sandra B walks out of Bergdoff Goodman with stuff she didn’t pay for after unsuccessfully trying to return them didn’t make sense to me. Don’t these products have barcodes? Also the part where she pretends to be a couple who just checked out, don’t hotels always check IDs? Did I miss something here? Did the filmmakers think the audience would have never shopped in a department store or checked into a hotel and so wouldn’t know better?

5. Rihanna and Awkwafina were good. The latter especially. It was obvious they were ticking racial boxes and they still missed a Latina.

6. Speaking of which, Mindy Kaling’s Hindi accent was atrocious; I don’t think how the lady speaking to her kept a straight face. They would have done better to hire Priyanka Chopra

7. The film did pick up once the Met Gala plot got underway.

8. I now have a crush on Sarah Paulson instead of Cate Blanchett

9. There was some gay subtext with Sandra B and Cate and I wished they’d gone to town with it.

10. Anne Hathaway can act, and is also attractive which is suddenly a surprise to me.

I came away not entirely irritated and somewhat entertained so it was not a complete loss. It seemed like a waste that with presumably a big budget and a great cast, they couldn’t have done better.

Have you watched the film? What did you think?

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